6 Months In – Sapphire Is So Scuffed: A Love Affair with My Engagement Ring! 💍
Hello, dear ring enthusiasts!
It’s been six months since I said “yes” to the love of my life, and I’m here to share a little story about my beautiful engagement ring—a stunning sapphire that’s also a bit… scuffed. 😬
The Magic of My Sapphire
Let me start by saying, when I first laid eyes on my engagement ring, I was enchanted. The deep blue sapphire set against a delicate halo of diamonds made my heart skip a beat. There’s just something about sapphires—their rich color, durability, and unique charm that captivates.
However, as time goes on, I’ve noticed some scuff marks and tiny scratches accumulating on that precious stone. It’s a bit disheartening, to be honest, but it also got me thinking about the nature of gemstones and the journeys they go through.
The Reality of Everyday Wear
Sapphires are known for their durability, scoring a solid 9 on the Mohs hardness scale, making them tougher than diamonds for everyday wear. Yet, they aren’t invincible! I’ve read discussions about how different settings and lifestyles can impact the longevity of our beloved rings. I’m curious—how do others feel about their rings months or even years after the big day?
Your Thoughts on Care and Maintenance
Since I’ve been pondering my ring’s scuffs, I’m eager to get tips and tricks from this fabulous community! What preventive measures have you taken to keep your gems looking pristine? Do you have any go-to cleaning methods or favorite products that have worked wonders?
The Beauty of Imperfection
While I have my moments of insecurity about the wear-and-tear, I’ve come to appreciate the scuffs as a testament to my journey. They tell the story of love, adventure, and life happening—an imperfect beauty. Do you feel the same about your ring? Have you had moments of regret or concern about keeping it flawless? Or do you embrace the unique character that scuffs bring to your piece?
Show Off Your Rings!
As we dive deep into this conversation, I’d love to see your engagement rings too! Share your photographs, stories, and experiences with your own gems! Let’s inspire each other by showing what true love looks like—imperfections and all.
Questions for Discussion:
- Have you experienced any wear on your engagement ring? How do you manage it?
- What types of stones do you think handle everyday wear the best?
- Any tips for cleaning and maintenance that you swear by?
- What does your ring mean to you beyond its physical appearance?
Can’t wait to hear everyone’s stories, tips, and see those dazzling rings! Let’s keep this conversation flowing. 💖💎✨
I have a garnet and after over a year it’s barely scuffed. Sapphires are supposed to be 9/10 on the hardness scale and garnets are only 6-7 so I hate to say it but that might not be a sapphire!
I don’t know much about jewelry but I’m invested in the update
I have a massive lab sapphire that I’ve worn almost daily since March-ish. I’ve banged that damn thing on SO MUCH and while the 9k gold is certainly scuffed/scratched, my stone looks absolutely perfect… Sapphires are about a 9 on the MOHS scale which is significantly durable. I’m fairly new to the gem game so I can’t offer much other than my anecdotal experience! Hope you find a solution xx
commenting for update
Commenting cause I’m invested in this mystery
If you do need to replace the stone, you can get a light blue lab grown sapphire or a light blue lab grown diamond for a very reasonable price (maybe less than $200?). Setting the new stone will be a bigger expense, though.
I think I am seeing a little bit of dirt under the stones, which is normal and will wash off easily.
It depends on what you do when you’re wearing it. It’s also not a diamond. Diamonds also can be scuffed, just not as likely. They can also break. I’ve had people say “I thought it’s the hardest thing on the earth” and I tell them, “It is, but they not invincible.” They break it apart to cut them and they are still breakable. Sapphires are not as strong or tough or durable. I always recommended pretty good sized prongs so that the prongs will take the hit and not the stone. It’s a very pretty ring by the way.
I ended up swapping my sapphire for a diamond after 11 years, because it kept chipping. Sapphire is almost as hard a diamond, so the jeweler was shocked, but I couldn’t keep recutting it and keep it the size it needed to be for my ring. I definitely don’t love it as much, but it is what it is. I had the sapphire reset into a necklace.
It’s hard to say from just these photos but it looks to me like “orange peel” effect. Gems are weird in that while cutting little tiny stress fractures form under the surface while cutting. Imagine a hammer on a chunk of glass but much smaller. When you go to polish hammer marks off with diamond the layer under it micrometers thick are so fractured they just flake off so you get a half polished half pitted surface. Sapphire is notorious for this when cutting.
Do an image search of that and see if it lines up. I see things that look more like marks from a wheel than everyday wear and tear. I suppose it’s possible some of the polished layer on top is flaking off. I’d also wonder if they just soaked it in a polymer (glue) and that made it look more polished. It would have the same effect of say beach glass when wet, it could hide the surface abrasion but it would be so thin it would eventually fall off. Also if it was from wear and tear the lines where the facets meet would be much worse as they are the first things to chip.
My sapphire is worn on the daily. I have it in a bezel setting because I told the jeweler I wanted a tank that could take to wear. I don’t take it off. I sleep clean shower and do everything in my rings. I take them off periodically to clean and hydrogen peroxide. I’ve never had a problem with stones only settings.
I have a parti sapphire ring that I’m very paranoid about scratches and what not so I’d say I’ve been very careful with it every time I wear it. It’s been my this year wearing it and it still looks like when I got it.
I’m sorry to say but from the photos, for a ring worn with care for 6 months, apart from the scruffs on the faces, even the prongs and the surroundings looks so worn. What material is it?
I hope you’re able to arrive at a conclusion that makes you and your finance feels better.
So you’re saying your jeweler says the ring shouldn’t be like that but isn’t offering any solutions? Have you actually taken the ring to the jeweler in person? Is there a reason they aren’t cleaning it professionally for you?
The jeweler has confirmed the stone should not be doing that. They should be offering a replacement. Have you gotten the ring appraised and insured? Those processes exist for situations just like this.
I say this as someone who had a vintage engagement ring. Had the exact same scenario of a well-loved, local jeweler being the original company we brought it from. They would not do anything so we used the insurance policy and get the ring replaced. We custom designed the second one to be just like it but sturdier.
If you have gotten it appraised & insured this is your next step.
I don’t have a real ring yet. I’ve been wearing a super cheap costume ring (it’s an insult to costume rings to call it that, but I don’t know a better word for it) for the last 3 months to get used to the feeling (and because I’m excited, ok? Lol).
I’m not nice to this thing. The “silver” coating has come off completely, revealing copper that is turning my finger green and probably poisoning me. I wear it working with horses, dyeing leather, digging in the dirt, whatever.
The piece of glass masquerading as a stone on my toy ring has farrrrrrr less damage than your sapphire. I agree with the other commenters that you should first make sure that’s a sapphire. After that, if it is, I don’t even know what to say.
I’ve had a sapphire engagement ring for 7 years and it’s never done this. I would definitely take this to a jeweler and have it looked at!
Sapphires are quite hard. I have a sapphire engagement ring. I’ve been wearing for over 2 years now with no scuffs. I think you need to confirm if this sapphire is real
My sapphire doesn’t have any scuffs and I’ve had it for almost 4 years
I have a Tacori exquisite cut sapphire eternity band, that I’ve worn for 10 months, and have seen micro scratches on the table with magnification. Natural sapphires absolutely scratch.
I find it strange that the scuffs are in the middle of the facets and not at the junctions? Most stuff I’ve seen gets scuffed or chipped at the junction rather than right in the middle. Is it possible this was just a really poor polishing job on the part of the lapidary?
I agree it doesn’t look like a sapphire That being said yes they are a strong stone but can get scratched. I had an eternity band and because it was all the way around it scratched my engagement ring which was sapphire . To get the scratches out they have to buff the stone sometimes take it down and you loose some of the size if the stone. But to me this does not look like a sapphire
What everybody else said… get it checked. Sapphires should not be scuffing like this! They are a very durable gemstone and wouldn’t scuff like this especially not in that amount of time.
plz keep us updated 🙂
There’s no way that’s a real sapphire, they’re just below diamonds on the Mohs scale. Normal wear and tear would not ruin a true sapphire that way.
This is a sapphire color grading chart I just found. Your stone would seem to be in the lower left?
https://www.brilliantearth.com/gemstones/buying-guide/sapphire/color/#
https://preview.redd.it/0g892zx4sizf1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2ed1cd8aff8c36f98b5bd86344adf1a19abbeb2d
Adding to my previous comment- This is one of my Montana sapphires after only a few months! I was so shocked and disappointed, but my local jeweler told me it is normal for natural sapphires to wear like this. I will also say, until I noticed these scuffs, I had not been gentle with my ring, as I thought that sapphires were supposed to be almost as hard as diamonds. Sadly they’re not. What I’ve learned is, when choosing a stone, you must prioritize between durability and color/display. If you’re not concerned too much about durability by all means get the beautiful, natural, earth-mined, color-shifting sapphires! But if scuffing will be a deal breaker for you, and you’re wanting a colored stone, I’d suggest going with either moissanite or diamond as there are SO many beautiful colors of both, and you’ll likely never see a scuff for the lifetime of the stone. Just my 2 cents, take it with a grain of salt! Hoping for the best for you, OP.
I’d have them check the “diamond” and metal parts as well. The scuffing on the main stone is akin to how a rhinestone wears.
I have an antique aquamarine ring and it has marks like this. I’d put money on this being an aquamarine
Are you putting it in a box with diamond jewellery? I managed to scratch mine like that
It’s not real
I’m with all the other posters – garnets are my birthstone and are a softer stone and they all look the same as the day I got them with regular wear.
I would take this into a third party jeweler or gemologist for further examination. I’m no expert, but I’m guessing this isn’t an authentic sapphire, whether lab or natural.
Diamond has a hardness of 10, Sapphire/Ruby/Corrundum has a hardness of 9.
The scale isn’t linear or exponential, it is literally, diamond scratches corrundum, then corrundum scratches Topaz, which means we have our number 10, 9, 8.
The difference is, an order of magnitude times harder for diamond vs corrundum, not just 10% or double, but hundreds of percent.
That said, my mother wore a dark blue Australian sapphire for a good 20+ years with only minor marks, upgraded to a lovely Aquamarine (both made by my dad) and wore that for almost a decade, the aquamarine had more damage than the sapphire, that said, it wasn’t much, but that’s how different the hardness is.
Lastly, there are cleavage planes in diamond along it’s 3 axis. Corrundum doesn’t have that, as it’s Aluminium Oxide, but it does chip differently with it’s own style of fracture etc.
Sooo, I have a different opinion about sapphire than most of the comments here. I have several sapphire rings and ALL of them have scuffs like this on the facets. However, all of the scuffs are not readily visible to the naked eye, they’re only noticeable when I zoom in about 10x. Most of mine are Montana sapphires, and I was shocked and disappointed when I noticed how much they’d chipped in so little time. The local (montana) jeweler I spoke with said yes, this is very common with sapphires, and even though they’re high on the mohs scale, they are really not close to a diamond or moissanite in hardness! I was shocked to learn this. Bottom line, I think this is normal for NATURAL, unheated sapphires to show wear like this, especially on the edges and facets. I think that LAB CREATED sapphires will fare much better in terms of not scuffing. But personally I’d rather have the natural sapphire, as they’re much more rare and in my opinion more beautiful with the color changes. Sorry you’re going through this, OP, keep us posted on what your jeweler says.
There’s some residue under your prong that someone mentioned looked like glue. Maybe body heat or minor heat source or soap or lotion is slowly melting/dissolving and then transferring it to your stone.
As a researcher, do you have access to GC/MS? You can tell if it’s a glue.
So sorry about this!
Commenting so I come back to see what happened!
I have a vintage sapphire in my e ring. It’s 80 years old and I wore it daily for more than a decade and I’m not the first owner.
It was appraised in person and confirmed to be real sapphire.
My sapphire has NOT scuffed like this at all.
My guess is that it’s nanositial or another substitute
I’ll say/ask what everyone else has said/asked – is it a real sapphire? They’re supposed to be tough as nails, pardon the pun.
I bought myself a cheap aquamarine ring that I wear all the time and it has been through a lot. By a lot I mean e.g. punching a wall (it was a horrible, stupid accident, not a manic fit, lol). It still looks impeccable, and as far as I know aquamarines are softer than sapphires…
Please check if sapphires are safe to clean in an Ultrasonic cleaner. I have emeralds & Tanzanite /diamonds that can be damaged by one. FWIW my rings are in the Tanzanite moh’s scale is around 6-7 & there’s no damage after 40+ years. Please get a GIA certified jeweller to appraise yr ring.
I’m so sorry this has happened to you. Keep all documentation fr initial purchase & any notes/emails to the alleged company. Good luck. Let us know how you get on with a certified jeweller. Best wishes from Australia 🦘🐨🇦🇺💐
Completely anecdotal but I was previously married 3 years to my ex husband with a lab grown sapphire ring (dark blue in the center and white ones on the band). Wore that thing everyday for almost 4.5 years (including time we were engaged) and I never chipped or scratched one like that. I would take it to get appraised and verified by a local jeweler if it was me!
A sapphire shouldn’t scuff through normal wear. I’m not sure what you have there but I’d be getting it checked, it’s not behaving like a sapphire so it may not be one.
There appears to be Glue under the prongs……
It might be fake. It should be like this! Find someone reputable to check it out! And you should talk to your husband about this. He should know, he may have gotten ripped off! Sorry this has happened to your once beautiful stone. 🙁
This almost looks like an oil slick on a moissanite stone. I agree with the above posters that bringing it to a jeweler to verify. Maybe they gave you a colored moissanite. At the end of the day even if you have to replace, you will still get something that is special to you both. Good luck 🩵
I feel naive. I never thought I needed to. I am going to get it looked at. Just called up a local company to take it in!
Have you had it independently confirmed to be a sapphire, that level of wear is looking more like aquamarine or something. My sapphire looks the same as the day I got it to the naked eye, which makes me think this simply can’t be corundum
Honestly I would be taking that to an independent jeweler to see if they can confirm it’s actually sapphire. I went with a softer stone than recommended (morganite) and it’s softer than sapphire and I don’t have any scuffs after 2 months of daily wear (and sleeping in it, I’m bad I know) so that many scuffs in 6 months is really surprising to me.